Friday, 24 February 2012

soppiest post ive probably made.

I got my tattoo. For my grandpa. <3 I miss him. I don't expect a lot of people to understand tbh. He was my best friend. And he just left. I try to remember all the good times. But its difficult considering... Well... I didn't enjoy going to the funeral. That killed me. Stupid me looked up his obituary earlier on. It broke my heart. All I did was try and look for the year he was born cause I'm confused between 1935 and 1936. I remembered all the bad stuff. How ill he was. And the day he passed. God. That was tough. I feel so stupid cause he passed 5 years ago and so many people would be over this by now. I'm not. At all. I hard myself because I can't move on. Don't think people realise that I struggle with it everyday. I just want to see him again. I'm such a tool. In bloody close to tears. What is wrong with me?!
Dunno, I think he'd be proud of me getting my tattoo. considering he had tattoos. Didn't sting that much actually. Didn't even cry. Proud of myself tbh.
God. I need to stop talking.

Rest In Peace, Grandpa.
I miss you a ridiculous amount.
And I love you. <3

Tuesday, 21 February 2012

Haven't had a rant in a while.
So I shall do that now.
Lifes going... Okay? I think. Got a lot on my mind tbh. Can't exactly mention any of that on this though. I'd get jarred for putting it all on here. I just can't be bothered with a lot of things. Or a lot of people.
Not really done too much recently. Kyrena and Annie were here on Friday. Annie stayed over. Went out on Saturday night, was a decent night tbh. Sunday, I was ill. Yesterday, i met Sonia then went out in Carries car with Carrie (obviously), Mairi, Lisa and someone called Amy. Had a pretty good time tbh. Miss my best friend. She's really ill right now so I've barely seen her. :/ Getting pierced on Friday. Getting my tongue and nose done. Delighted. Can't wait to have my tongue done again! Interested to see how the nose turns out... Better suit it.
Currently lying in my bed, watching Desperate Housewives, contemplating going outside to tell whatever junkie is in the corridor to shut up! My head is thumping.
In dire need of a hug tbh. It would make me happy.
Ow, ow, ow. Think I'm just gonna crawl under my duvet and die. -.-
Oh well. Pretty sure I shall be back to rant. Probably about how ill I feel. (':

Tuesday, 7 February 2012

Facebook is crap. Actually getting ridiculously boring. No one is ever on. My god, I need a job. -.-

Monday, 6 February 2012

urgh. -.-

What a fucking shit day. My moods been shit. Haven't gone out. Barely talked to anyone. Barely eaten. I'm shattered, but i dont want to sleep. My mind is fucked. I'm confused. I'm fed up. And I want to punch someone. I'm getting ridiculously annoyed with everything and everyone. I fucking snapped at my best friend today because of how I'm feeling. I just can't be bothered anymore. I don't know whats wrong with me. Think I just need someone to bitch to, tbh. Awch well. I will survive. (':

Friday, 3 February 2012


I've always gone through my life thinking I'm fat. I have always hated my body. Until today. I bought a jumper today. I'm a size 14. This jumper is a size 10. And it fits perfectly. And it dawned on me. I don't care that I'm not a size 6. I don't care if I have curves. I don't love my body, but I'm starting to like it more. I may not have a pancake stomach or match stick legs. I have nice curves and a rather nice set of... Well... You know. It shouldn't matter if you're over a size 10. From now on I'm going to start thinking more positively about myself. :3

Thursday, 2 February 2012

oh yes, i am bored.

I need sleep. But Jezza Kyle is just about to start. So I ain't shifting from my bed. What a bum I am. I need a job. So badly. Or I need to get into college. As soon as I get a bursary? I am getting a tattoo. Need my arm to clear up though. Hopefully it'll be okay by August. Just got to be good. Good luck me! I have no idea what else to say, though I'm in the mood for typing a lot. Oh well.
I'm so fucking tired. I hate my landlady. She comes in thinking she's god, without even knocking on the door. Fuck this. I'm going back to sleep. -.-